dear Alia - losing my path

whoohooops~ lama gila tak apdet segmen ni. sob.


seperti tajuk di atas, i'm losing my path. chincayo. no kidding.


i went home and found there's no my beloved oyen, i feel like crying. went home and feels "ohh why is my mom is not like other people's mom?" went home and feels "ohh why everybody got mom and dad as both and i only have one" went home and feels not being loved by anybody. everything i do just went wrong. when i do something good, i'm scolded for the good-things-i-didn't do. i'm not rewarded. it just hurt your feeling when you call home to talk to the-only-person-you-have but then he/she told you that he/she is just so busy that they don't even have the time to talk to you. am i really this lonely? or is that just because i'm not grateful enough?


i don't even feel like going home any more.


and why is my friend questioning my reason to always having "faham tak?" at the end of my sentence and the word "entahlah" as i respond to them? why can't they accept me the way i am. why did they jokes around with your habit when it is just the way you are.


Alia, why can't you be besides me. every minutes.




i'm eating krushers at KFC, and to think of someone that will always be regarded as friend. never more.

i'm staring at bright stars on the night sky. and to think of someone that i one loved with all my heart but he betrayed me.

i'm looking at stray cats. and to think of the cats that are not fated to be with me for a longer time.

i'm looking at people who get surrounded with people that love them back. and why i can't even have my beloved dad?

why do i always got separated with the people i love?







i'm losing my path...